there is no love in our verbs tonight
the concrete washes clean the slates we had it on
the air is crisp and sharp
something in the trees is writhing
I haven’t smoked a cigarette in days
why does everything feel like it’s burning?
we aren’t the colors we used to be

two deep breathes in
one slammed door out
you left your car light on all night
the grass isn’t good enough but the suffocating silence of your car suits you fine
you know the way i hate silence

i’ve heard this reel before
the same spinning carousel of no tap out 
no seat belts
there are no surrenders in our game
it’s tears, or shame,
there are no gold medal in our arena
only hearts slammed in car doors until they burst
only dreams we had burned with cigarette butts and lemon juice

do you remember we had dreams once?
we had compromises 
and meet half ways
and here 3 hours later,
I still want nothing more that to scream my soul red in the face 
until one of us cracks 
i don’t care who
 
I hope it is me

I hope i grand canyon split until there is only a gaping void where i used to be
i hope i side walk crack gashes into these sorry limbs
turn inside out and backward until i feel anything again

i hope you feel nothing too

i hope my apathy 
is met with your apathy
and we can meet somewhere
not necessarily half way
maybe a street corner
with no sentimental value

and maybe together
we can start to care again